Guilty Pleasure

I guess it's true, I have feelings for him.

How could I stand my friend up then lied to her that I was having a meeting with workmates but in fact I was having lunch with him, whining about our frustrations?! Tho I know we share the same kind of mindset over many things, and I am glad he still remembers I am doing the MPhil things,I feel happy about this. And totally was happy when he said "I understood! I know how it's felt like, it's troubling"...but then? I did not hesitate about lying to my friend to cover this fake dating. And I certainly feel guilty about it. Guilty pleasure, huh?

But obviously I think he just treats me like a little sister. Brother, huh? Finally I have one, but this one, I think I certainly dun want to be friends only.

Gosh, I dun want to be disturbed anymore! Make it fast, if there's something between us, I hope he can notice and come to me and things shall be done!! What the heck, why would I becoming like this?

I hate all kinds of uncertainty!!!!!!!!!

Plus, am I changed?