Feel. Doubts. Frustration

I guess, for the very first time, I can say "Never knew I can feel like this".

Yes, I think I have feeling for some one. Being troubled by the sight of this guy for quite a number of days, I only know that he is frequently on my mind. And I totally wanna talk to him - it doesn't matter if the topic is simply about my MPhil attempt or comp lit or mundane daily lives.

Can this be diagnosed as "love" or just "admire towards a senpai"? I dunno know. Even tho I clearly see that my mind is becoming less troubled by thinking of him, I still can't put a figure on it.

What is the most certain thing is, I absolutely have affection for brotherly figures. And I absolutely see myself in him.

That's all.

Oh, and I know I can't act rush at this moment. Thus I can't make any bold acts. Yes Master Jack, I know I must not do anything stupid.

Time will tell.

I have been single for 23 years, it's not bad to wait a little bit more. Besides, I have learnt how to be a good single for ages, it won't hurt that much if I remind in this way.