When I first read the biography of YOSHIKI, the drummer/pianist/leader of the legendary band X Japan, I just thought: "Wow...this man is God. How come he can push his limit further and further, again and again? Besides a good singing voice, this man has everything!"
And then I realized, he is my ultimate role model - no matter what kind of person I am becoming, with his kind of extreme fearlessness, impossible is nothing.
Or, am I just overestimating myself again?
I adore him for he can have a target of life at such an early stage of life; at his early 20s, he knew that he was to found the most powerful band with his most trusted teammates, and so founded his own record company Extacy. He knew where he was going - every corner of the world through the influence of music and art - at that early stage. Then I look to myself, by my age Yoshiki had been rushing here and there, working for his goal and what the fuck am I doing now? Just starting? Hell this is so not acceptable! The most important thing is, he was not distracted and he would fight till the end of his life (literally, that's why he was, and still is, the most fragile musician you can name of LOL). Literally, he is a fighter, a thinker, a creator, an artist, an inventor... It sounds like except for his own physical condition, he cannot be stopped by anything. This makes me thrilled and, at the very same time, frustrated me: why can't I be like him? Yes, I can see there are gonna be shit loads of obstacles in front of me...but why can't I just focus on one or two things only and shout the magic word "GO!" then fight for it?
After all, I am so intimated by the future, the uncertainty.
I wish I could read the book again asap, so I can gain the naive yet powerful bravery for the coming wars in the future.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
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